Just Call Me if You Can't Get The Bleeding to Stop

I would love to report that the first real day of second semester went smoothly, but that just wouldn't happen to me now would it?

It started out with a bang!  I'm putting on my shoes in the living room and Scott is dressing and loading four sleeping boys into the van.  He's down to the last one when I hear...WHACK...ERIN GET IN HERE... ERIN HURRY...THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE...I'M SO SORRY TOMMY...

This amazing thing happens to me in these situations.  I curtain of calm falls all around me.  Not just calm, really really calm.  I can think straight, delegate, and prioritize.  Priority number one, assess the victim, priority number two calm down the hysterical husband. 

Tommy looks at me through the blood that's dripping into his wide eyes.  I tell him he's fine, I don't really know that but Scott's worrying enough for all of us right now, I don't need poor Tommy to get scared.  I instruct Scott to grab a towel.  There's too much blood to get a good look.  I apply pressure and talk to Scott.  Take a deep breath and tell me what happened.  Pausing 19 times to apologize, the events tumble out.  He picked up Tommy and threw him over his shoulder to carry him out except he threw him a little high, directly into the twirling blades of the ceiling fan (high speed of course).  Whoops!

I checked the spot, still too much bleeding to see anything.  I did a one handed neuro check and called for the first aid kit.  Our kit is actually a pimped out old tackle box.  It's basically an ICU in a box.  I'm really not joking.  I would have brought home a suture kit if I could have legally obtained some local anesthetic. I was well stocked to say the least. 

I lift the towel one more time and it's slowed enough to see that the gash was deep, probably as deep as you can get on a forehead.  I reassured Tommy again and Gavin came in from the van.  He observed from the bedroom doorway, told Tommy, "it'll be OK" and then told me he'd babysit the little boys in the van.  How mature! I love eight year olds. 

I looked at Scott, still overly anxious, but no longer jumping around, and ask what his plans were for the morning.  I knew I couldn't miss anymore time from school without being kicked out of the nursing program and I already knew his answer.  He owns a Fed Ex route and sick days and emergencies really aren't an option unless they're preplanned.  As usual, no planning or forethought went into this latest mishap.  That being said, be extra nice to your Fed Ex man today if you get any packages and if you notice blood on his hands, don't comment.

I had no time to sit around weighing the pros and cons.  We were late. bleeding and now I had blood all over my scrubs.  This is when I hate being a mom.  Making decisions when no one is going to win, when there isn't a right answer.  I didn't put my family through hell for the last 9 mos just to let it be a waste of time when I'm dismissed from nursing school.  There is no back up driver for Scott and the packages pile up and customers complain and we lose money if they aren't delivered immediately.  I guess  everyone loses today!

I thoroughly cleaned, bandaged and pressure dressed the wound in a sterile fashion (thanks Mrs Marshall) and reassessed.  I assured Scott for the millionth time that he wasn't going to win worst dad of the year for this and kissed him goodbye.  We loaded up in the van and headed South.  Either to Mrs Tammie's (daycare/2nd mother) or the ER.  I would decide when we got closer.  By the time we got to Tammie's, it still hadn't bled through the dressing so I unloaded the kids and brought them inside.  I did another quick assessment and explained the incident to Miss Tammie.  She didn't even bat an eye.  This is one of the many reasons we love her.  We would have been kicked out of a real daycare a long time ago.  I gave her instructions and told her to call me if she couldn't get the bleeding to stop. 

I left feeling like the worst mom in the world.  This is a common feeling these days.  Luckily I made it through six hours of labor and delivery clinicals without receiving a page to the emergency room.  I did receive however receive hourly picture texts showing me the status of the dressing. 

We made it home just as a huge storm rolled in and knocked out our power for the next six hours.  I had to do my last dressing change by the light of the I phone flashlight app.  Thanks Apple, this app really comes in handy when you live in a house with nine flashlights and no batteries. 

I'm happy to report the wound is healing nicely and even open to air today.  To add to my list of charity patients, during our power outage, Finn cut his foot pretty bad on a glass he smashed in the dark kitchen.  Business is good at Erin's Emergency Wound Care Clinic.

Most of you that know me are probably scrolling down to find the picture as you know I would classify a good head wound as a fabulous photo op.  However, Scott mentioned to me yesterday that he left our camera charger in Wisconsin on his last vacation.
Hmmmmm...
Maybe need to reconsider that Father of the Year nomination.

It's July 26th, Do You Know Where You're Supposed to Be?

Last night we shifted into high gear as we got the boys ready for their first day back to Miss Tammie's (family daycare).  We've spent the last two weeks home together while I'm on break from school.  I soaked up all the quality time and fun we've had in hopes of mentally getting through this last semester. 

Scott grocery shopped for cold lunch food and laid out clothes and packed diaper bags and skateboards and helmets and found all the shoes.  Quite a feat when we've spent the last two weeks barefoot.  We were on break from the classroom, but unfortunately not from homework.  We had to read most of our labor and delivery nursing text and fill out the corresponding homework for 12 long chapters.  I had to type a paper, create a presentation, two visual aids and make about 60 different drug cards.  As most of you know I'm a bit of a procrastinator.  Needless to say, I worked furiously and was up till 2:45.  I laid down just long enough on the sofa to have a bad dream.  I opened my eyes only to see it was 4:45 and time to get up.  My heart still racing from my dream, I packed up all my school stuff and got ready.  Scott woke up all the little boys, fed them, dressed them, put them in their car seats and packed the van.  I made three separate trips to the van with all my school stuff  I kissed Scott in the driveway and we were off.

Back in our old routine.  No sleep, no time, no fair!  I drove in the dark to Tammie's, woke her up, piled four sleepy boys on her sofa and I was off to school. 

I pulled in the parking lot and scored a great parking spot.  I never get that lucky.  I unpacked the van, arms full and headed into school.  It was surprising that none of my classmates beat me this morning.  It was far too quiet and not nearly enough people were in the halls.  Then came that weird panicky feeling and I started to question everything.  Where is everyone?  Slowly I connected the dots. none of my classmates had returned my six am texts, no other students yet, empty parking lot.  I walked back toward the doorway with all my books and poster boards and ask the front desk what day third semester starts.  "Tomorrow", she replied.  Sigh...  Tomorrow, of course it starts tomorrow...  That's why I stayed up cramming till quarter to three and woke up my entire family and hauled them across town and wasted Scott's time with all the packing...  Tomorrow... Sigh...

In a huff, I called Scott.  Can you believe it?  Scott wasn't nearly as upset as me.  His attitude was, awesome, go pick up the kids and do something fun.  He was right this was a free day.  Nothing due, no where to go, nothing more to study.  Today was like found money. 

I received a few texts from my sleepy classmates on the way to Tammie's.  I scooped up the boys and we headed home.  Then very best part happened.  I lowered Petey down from my hip onto the ground... 

and...

and...

he took his first few steps.  Had I sent him to Miss Tammie's all day, I would have missed it. 
Yay Petey, Yay me!!!  So I've spend my found day smiling at this chunky, unsure, excitable, wobbly little walker.  24 hours lost somewhere between the last day of vacation and the first day of third semester.  Happy Monday to all of you out there who know where you're supposed to be today.  Happy Monday!

17 Days Sober (free of corndogs)

After returning from a two week north woods men's vacation, Scott was amazed and I think a little impressed that the boys went through a box of 63 corn dogs.  WHAT??? I knew Gavin has some serious dietary curiosities, but 63 corn dogs in two weeks?  I was appalled.

Upon their return, we had to buy a box of 16 because I knew sudden withdrawal might lead to serious side effects.  I see this in the ICU with alcoholics and illicit drug abusers.  We have no choice but to tie and drug them to get them through withdrawals.  I don't own any pediatric restraints so I decided a step down approach was most appropriate.

With each corn dog I made, in the microwave of course, I was more disgusted.  Toxic radioactive snack on a treated wooden stick activated by the microwave's free radical producing waves.  OK, so in reality, maybe not going to kill the kids, but really bad when that's all they're eating.

So here goes.  I have been detoxing my family over the last two weeks.  We've come along way, but we still have an epic journey ahead of us.  I made up a few guidelines to start us down the right path.

Week One:
     Every meal will be eaten at the kitchen table at a meal time
     The kitchen will be closed in between meals
     You will eat what is served
     I always make sure you like some part of the meal
     You will not cry just because I put something on your plate that you hate or are scared of
     NO CORN DOGS!

With just these few rules, some amazing things happened.  I think we've sung grace about 60 times in the last few weeks.  I haven't found anything moldy under the sofa and anything sticky on the end table.  Scott and I are eating less (more mindful I guess) and the boys are all eating more.  The quality of the food we're eating has went waaaaaay up.  I think it might be a pride thing.  No mom wants to prepare, cook, set the table, call the family and then have some lame disappointing processed meal to present.  We've also had some very interesting real family conversations. 

Week Two Guidelines:
     Every meal will have at least 2 servings of fruits and vegetables
     Everyone will try everything on their plates
     Everyone will clear their own dishes and clean up their own spots

Even more amazing things happened the second week.  Gavin's list of foods he'll eat has doubled.  New foods that he actually likes include Cheeseburgers (not super healthy I know, but this boy has never ate beef in all of his 8 years of life), cauliflower and kiwi fruit.  The list of foods he'll tolerate is even bigger.  I think now I could even put a dead rat on his plate and he would just eat around it without having a complete meltdown.  A variation of this may actually make a fun practical joke.  I'm spending a lot more time in the kitchen, which is probably one of the most wholesome places to spend time as a mom.  People are even clearing their own spots occasionally without me asking.  Yay family!

Week Three starts next week.  If they feel challenged now, it's gonna get way tougher.  I found something that's called "clean" eating.  In a nutshell (you can probably eat nutshells while eating clean)  it eliminates all processed, empty calorie, fast, junkie, microwave fun kid type foods.  So tons of fruits and veggies, lots of lean cuts of meat, eggs and whole grains.  Think food 50 years ago, eating everything the way it occurs in nature.  Baked potatoes, not potato chips, fresh tomato, not ketchup.  You get the idea.  We already buy pretty much all our produce and dairy organic and that will continue.  We're supposed to focus on local produce.  This means the garden needs to go into overdrive.  I continue to research clean eating recipes and have started cooking some of them.  Last night we had green cauliflower (some kind of broccoli/cauliflower combo), fresh green beans and chicken kiev.  I normally buy the kievs frozen, but last night we made our own.  Consequently, my new fav kitchen gadget is the mallet.  Why haven't I ever owned one of these before? 

New guidelines for week three are hopefully going to include some of the following:
     No negotiating before the food even reaches the table
     Older children need to set a good example, no "I hate fill in the blank" statements
     No sugar (I say this as I take the last drink of the last can of Mountain Dew)
     No white flour (gulp), we already use whole wheat pasta, but clean is a whole new level
    
Next week the kids go back to daycare and I go back to school so that could get interesting.  The usual Lunchables aren't gonna fly anymore.  Some of the clean eating blogs mention having a free meal every week.  I've decided that Friday nights will be free.  I'm already thinking about what cheat foods we might feast on. 

So out with some of the old habits and in with some new ones.  I worry that next week with school things will get overwhelming and I will be tempted to revert to our quick cooking snacky ways, but I hope that blogging will hold me a little more accountable.  You'll hear next week the good, bad and even the ugly.  Hopefully more good than ugly. 
    
    
   

In The Garden Today

In the garden today the brittle elderly sunflowers are acknowledging their death.  I didn't have the heart to pull them yet...

In the garden today, the latest group of baby cukes are winding their vines over anything that will hold still (including the senior sunflowers)...

In the garden today, the hibisci (I'm sure that's the plural form) are floating on the breeze...

In the garden today, the roses are having a beauty contest...

In the garden today, I crowned this one the winner...

In the garden today, the goldfish are swimming...

In the garden today, the lemons are smiling...

In the garden today, the banana hands are sun bathing...

In the garden today, Queen met her King

(FYI, spiders are super hard to photograph, partially because I am sooooo scared of them and partially because my camera is, I have a really hard time focusing on them,)

Behind the Scenes

Sometimes the perfect photo requires alot more than a spontaneous snap of my camera.  If I'm not takeing candids, the pose has to be thought up (sometimes this just happens naturally) and the boys have to be dressed (if it's something planned), and the spotters have to be in place

The spotters let go, I snap as many pictures as I can before it looks like someone might fall.

Eventually one of the modesl falls...

The slow to react spotter comes back in and attempts to save the smaller model...

The models end up in a heap on the ground.  I do an assessment and look for injuries.  Most of my photo shoots end up with my in a heap on the ground, either crying or wrestling or just shocked from falling out of trees.  So sometimes 30 seconds of shooting can end up taking an hour.

Our Beach, No, Our Party Trip

"This is why we love Erin, she'll do the craziest things and she's such a good talker.  This one time..." 
A friend of mine was describing me to a new acquaintance the other day and decided to tell her some of the impulsive things I've done.  It made me laugh remembering this one particular situation, so I'll share.

It was the middle of a super hot FL summer and I was taking the boys to the beach.  We had no entertainment budget at the time, so the beach was pretty much it.  We're beach regulars and by this time we knew all the best "kid" beaches to go to.  Kid beaches are similar to dog beaches.  You have to find a beach where you won't bother anyone, where your kids can run, throw sand and scream and where all the other beach patrons can run in a pack with yours and do all the same things.  Unlike the dog beach, it's probably illegal at the kid beach to keep the really badly behaving ones on a leash or at least with a muzzle. We found a little hidden spot that fit and had been frequenting it often.  This particular day, we turned off the main road onto the small side road.  As we passed Lazy Days Resort, a gated community for the rich, tan and wrinkled over the age of 120, I noticed a big sign.  10th anniversary party today, members only. 

Without even thinking I turned in and pulled up to the guard gate.  I rolled down the window.
Guard: Hi Mam, where's your sticker?
Me: I'm here for the party.
The guard scans my van full of children (this is an over 55 community)
Me: I'm Delores's granddaughter ( in a community of this size, there must be an ample amount of Delori), I'm offering demonstrations on children's first aid and CPR, you know for their grand kids, it's part of the party
Guard: Oh, didn't know they were doin that
Me: (I see a group of women's tap dancers warming up), I'm on after the dancers
Guard: Alright, go ahead then, have fun

They boys are getting excited as we find a parking spot.  The entire clubhouse and parking lot have been turned into a Luau complete with a group of hula dancers taking the stage.  Worst case scenario, I'll have to do a small demo on how to apply pressure to a bleeding wound (in my beach attire, but that's beside the point).  Best case scenario, we lay low, have tons of fun, eat lots of great FREE food, watch some 70 year old hula dancers and party with 400 of my closest friends over the age of 60.

Here's one of the dance club demos.  This place had 3 or 4 dance teams made up of community members.  So all you cheerleaders and high school dance team members I know a great place you can live in about 60 years.

Well, the plan for laying low didn't really work, but I never had to go up on stage either.  We were very popular which was a slight problem.  Everyone wanted to know who we belonged to.  I stuck with random Delores.  You know, she lives over there, always gesturing a different direction.  When people wanted more information I said things like, you know she has that gray cat, she walks with a cane and drives her golf cart everywhere.  I can see from the parking lot that 300 of the 400 guest have driven their golf carts to the party.  People seemed to buy it and several people even claimed to know her. 

Mom why do all the old guys pull there pants up so high?   Like this.  He danced like this for awhile until I realized he didn't wear any undies today and his little man parts where hanging out.


We enjoyed the party atmosphere for several hours and then it was time to eat.  Everyone got in line, so we followed.  As we neared the front of the line I could see that people were handing tickets to the caterers behind the table.  When it was our turn, I said to Gavin, hand the woman our tickets.  Gavin looked at me, what tickets? You know the blue food tickets I gave you to hold onto?  Gavin's eyes got wide, I don't know.  Check your pockets honey.  This went on for about 45 seconds before the woman behind the counter insisted we just go ahead and eat.  She could hardly stand the thought of Gavin feeling bad about losing the tickets (that we never had).  I apologized profusely, dang kids!  We had a lovely lunch.

Here's baby Tommy eating a giant hotdog of somesort.  In hindsight, probably shouldn't have let him eat this without cutting it up.  But I was here for a first aid demo right?  Folks, gather around as I demonstrate the Heimlich maneuver.

Afterward, Gavin and Tommy danced while we sat and watched the tappers.  We were full, the boys were tired and we'd been entertained.  As we said our goodbyes, several of our elderly pals insisted we return next year for the party.  I assured them we would, and even considered it briefly.  But knew that once the boys told Scott, we would never be allowed to leave the house again.   The cater ran up to us as we were about to leave and handed me several containers of left overs.  She insisted we bring them home to feed these hungry boys who were just sooooo polite.  I thanked her repeatedly and loaded them into the van with all of my first aid demo models. 

We loaded up and drove back through the guard gate.  The guard waved goodbye and yelled, how'd it go?  Great, just great! 

So we headed home, no sandy feet, no sunburn and no stinky shells.  Just some happy, full, satisfied boys and a van full of Luau food.  So much for no entertainment budget.  This sure beat going to the beach.  Happy Anniversary Lazy Days.  Happy Anniversary!!!

Meet Queen.  I found her in my garden this week while weeding.  She's set up a lovely web right in the middle of my rosemary.  I'm not exactly sure how I feel about her yet, but I think we'll try to come up with a working relationship.  I'm not a spider person in general, but I feel like she has just as much of a right to be in the garden as I do.  I've identified her and it appears she's fairly harmless although super creepy.  So, welcome to the garden I guess. 

Circling the Drain... Alone

It was an hour past the end of my shift, I tried to leave several times, but just kept going back.  Something drew me back to his room.  Torn between what I know I need to do and what I know my family needs me to do.  Four little boys and an exhausted lonely husband don't usually understand why I can't walk out the ICU doors at the end of my shift and come home to them on time. 

I said goodnight as I held his hand.  I didn't pretend that everything was OK.  I'm getting more comfortable with silence and the role it plays prior to an impending death.  Tonight I let the silent moments lead our conversation and it finally feels right, not awkward, not uncomfortable.  Maybe I'm becoming a nurse.  I like when the situations I read about in the nursing texts actually materialize in front of my eyes.  I stroked his forehead with the thumb of one gloved hand.  He begged me to call his wife and tell her how much he loved her and how much he has enjoyed his 63 years with her.  I promised him I would.  As I turned to go, he called me back to his bedside.  Don't call her tonight, wait till the morning.  If you call her now, she'll try to drive here and she doesn't see well in the dark and she gets confused.  It's not safe. 

He would rather die alone than put his wife at any risk.  That's true selflessness, putting your spouses needs in front of your own even in your very last hour. 

It was my bedtime hours ago, but I can't sleep.  So I will say a prayer for him and his wife and wonder if we'll have an empty bed in the morning and dare to dream that maybe just maybe I'll walk into his room in the morning and stroke his forehead with my thumb and say Good Morning. 

Good Night

Looks Like a Good Spot For a Treehouse

I'm home for two short weeks in between semesters.  Next week I'll start the final semester of the nursing program.  So we've been making the most of our down time.  We can sleep in, eat three meals each day around the table, and watch movies during the afternoon thunderstorms.

We needed to burn some energy today, so out the door we went. 

The breeze was blowing and the sun was shining.  It was the perfect day for an adventure.

One of the best parts about staying home all day is letting the boys pick there own clothes.  

No dress code around here, even though it was 98 degrees this afternoon.  Oh well.

We have this big crazy jungle across the road from us that we've just never explored.  Well today we did.

One at a time we peeked through the vines and palms...

what a pleasant surprise...

a massive...

                                          

old Banyan tree.

                       

The boys were as excited as I was.  They eagerly made elaborate tree house plans.  I smiled as Gavin started telling Tommy how they could construct an escalator.  I miss believing that anything is possible and dreaming without any logic or doubt.  Of course there will be an escalator and a fireman's pole and a rope ladder!

After they firmed up the tree house blueprints, they were off to look for gators.  I was happy to report, no gators today.

We picked some wildflowers and weeds along the way.

They made a cute bouquet. 

Until Finn knocked them on the floor.  It took us twenty minutes in the sweltering heat to collect all these, another five minutes to find a vase and about 45 seconds to knock it on the floor.  Why do I even try?

The whole time we were picking, the thunder was rumbling and the clouds were rolling.  Just as we got inside, big fat raindrops started falling.  It was time once again to cuddle up for an afternoon movie.

We’d be Honored to Have You for Dinner

We’d be honored to have you over to join us for dinner. I guarantee you it will be an unforgettable night, full of surprises, mishaps and laughs. I do not guarantee however that you will have a spot to sit or clean fork.

After sweeping under the sofa last week, I've instituted a mandatory “we only eat at the table” rule. Ideally, this would mean that the kitchen table would always be cleared off, polished and set. But, as you can imagine, this is not always the case in our house.

I sat down tonight with the boys for dinner and Pete peaked at me across the table through the sewing machine that was still sitting on the table from an earlier sewing project. I just had to pull out the camera and snap a few (or 179 to be exact).

So back to your invite…

We will be serving a very healthy, super yummy spaghetti. Organic marinara with pureed carrots slipped in, secret slivers of onions and even sneakier ground turkey breast.

You can choose from a sewing machine view, a laundry view or even…

a seat next to the cat…

No one likes to sit next to him, so you better arrive early so you can choose a good seat…

Although the top of the table is always eventful, sometimes under the table is where the action's at…

Dishes aren’t always available, so you may want to consider bringing your own. Although paper plates and mason jars will be offered.

If you have an urge during dinner to make a pair of Thai fisherman pants, it just so happens, I will have the sewing machine plugged in, fabric, and a very very general pattern available.

The fabric will be right here in the laundry basket with the clean laundry and the confiscated sewing scissors that are not for cutting spaghetti thank you!

In an effort to be frugal and creative, I went to Joann Fabric and purchased materials to make said Thai fisherman pants (available on the internet for $120) fabric only $6.00 but picture frames were $120, whoops blew the budget.

But just look at the decal… worth every penny!

Anyway, back to your invitation. As always, clothing is optional at out dinners. There's no dress code here. Pajamas, yesterday’s onesie or nothing at all. Be a free spirit, we never judge.

We’re not prim and proper here, unbuckle your belt, pull up a chair and dig in. If most of the food misses your mouth and lands in you lap and on the floor, you’ll be in good company.

Seconds are always available. We always make more than enough.

Also, you should know that we never stay in our own seats. Think musical chairs minus the music.

There’s no need to wipe your face, ever. No pressed linen napkins will be provided. Actually not even paper towels. I’m still boycotting them, sorry. My best advice is, wear a bib or a shirt you don’t really care too much about.

You can't eat dessert until everyone is finished so you might want to bring some light reading material. Some of us are very slow eaters. Might I reccomend the WWE wrestling encyclopedia?

After a piece of chocolate cake bean cake (reduced sugar devils food cake mix, 1 can black beans, and 1 cup applesauce, don’t tell any of the guests) you might be asked to go outside for an impromptu photo shoot.

You might even be asked to model the Thai fisherman pants you made.

I’ll be the first to admit that some ideas look better on the internet than they do on straight 2 year olds.

So I might not recommend these unless your signing your son up for America’s Most Flamboyant Toddler, but he loves them and quite frankly, I spent 3 hours making them so he will wear them…

and I will definitely take 47 pictures of him wearing them…

and will most certainly blog about Finn and his Thai fisherman pants.

If you chose to sew a pair at our dinner party, you can even put a pocket on yours. I would have, but I was already over the 1 hour (according to the internet) suggested time requirement.

You can run through the feilds barefoot and we can even sit on the front porch and wait for the sun to set.

So I hope you’ll join us. We don’t often have dinner guests. I’m still not sure why but make sure you RSVP soon!