You are only allowed to have 2 tattoos at a time... Then pick one to wash off... No your neck is off limits...
That's not a tiny penis... That's called an outie belly button...
The label said washable... Why isn't this coming off?
Watch where you step... the cat threw up again...
Elliott, get off the table... IRS agents don't like cats... Don't lay on his computer...
Who squirted all this toothpaste in the bath tub... well it's not a substitute for soap...
Get those seatbelts on or you're walking to school...
Why is your nose bleeding... Who made his nose bleed...
No more donuts...
That's lotion not bubble bath... you're going to be scrubbing this tub all night
I'm not parking... I'm just dropping him off... I know it's illegal to park in a handicapped spot... look, my van isn't in park, it's in drive... I don't know who he thinks he is, he's not even a real cop...
Whoever spilled the cat food can clean it up... didn't anyone hear me... the cat didn't spill it by himself... he doesn't even have thumbs...
Is this a dead lizard... why's there a dead lizard in the sofa... Tommy, get your gloves... Don't give it to Finn, throw it outside...
Dad let you put how many tattoos on...
Please please please put the lid down...
That was it in a nutshell this week
At work
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