All This Just to go to Work?

I woke up this morning and was thrilled knowing I didn't have to work today. I have worked the last four days in a row and need today to get caught up before going back to work this weekend. I work in a Medical ICU. While work is mentally and physically exhausting, it's the preparing and packing of the children before work that is the real challenge.

The boys all go to a family daycare (that we are quickly taking over) when I go to work. Miss Tammie has truly become part of our family becoming a second mother to all the boys. The boys enjoy going and have fun playing with the other kids. Getting four boys prepared for a day away from home and away from mommy is insane. It requires packing so much stuff. I found a giant soccer backpack at Ross last year and it works perfect. It's huge and has tons of pockets and zippers. Packing all four boys each day is so much work. Yesterday morning went something like this:

Put in six, size one diapers for Petey, look for the wipes, they're missing, find the open wipes in the bathroom (someone tried to wipe and it didn't go well), clean the toilet and disinfect the floor, add water to the wipes (the were all dried out) and pack those, look for Finn's diapers, we're out, throw a cloth diaper (perfect for emergencies) out for Finn and make a mental note to stop on the way to Tammie's to buy more diapers, can't find Finn's rash cream, find Finn's rash cream under my bed along with some dirty dishes (who has dirty dishes under their bed? that's disgusting), boys will be swimming today, so I add two swim diapers, find the sunscreen, it's expired, find another bottle of sunscreen with no expiration date, assume this means it's ok and pack it, find Finn and Petey's sun suits (UV protected full body suits), pack them, look in Petey's dresser for outfit to wear now and spare outfit for today, nothing in his dresser looks big enough today, did he grow that much overnight?, find some baby gifts that I had not put away yet, Thank you Miss Tammie for buying 3-6 mos onesies, they look like they'll fit perfect, remember that I never sent a thank you to Miss Tammie, feel guilty for awhile, pack one outfit and lay one in Petey's car seat to dress him in when I get him up, Tommy wakes up and growls at me when I say, "Good Morning Sunshine" (I guess he's Johnny Rain Cloud today), look for two outfits for Finn, he has 17 pairs of pants and two pairs of shorts in his drawer today, take both shorts and keep searching for shirts, find one shirt and decide to be satisfied with that, pack the spare shorts and set out the other outfit for today, look for swim trunks for the big boys, find a pair for Tommy, it has poop in it, in his drawer with poop in it, probably hiding it from me, decide we live in the most disgusting house ever, make a mental note to clean and sanitize everything tonight when I get home, find two pair of swim trunks in Gavin's drawer and take both, Tommy will have to wear a pair that's a little large, good punishment for putting poop shorts in your dresser drawer, pack the shorts and look for outfits for the big boys for today, find them quicker that expected but no socks, make another mental note to buy more socks the next time I'm at Target, didn't we just buy two packs? Tommy is fighting with Gavin who is now awake, Tommy yells at Gavin for smiling at him, Gavin smiles bigger, I go off in search of shoes, Tommy follows me, I decide I will not talk to him in hopes of avoiding an argument, find four left sandals for Finn, take 30 seconds to daydream about the perfect shoe system, decide it's never going to happen and keep searching, find a right sandal, brush the spider webs off and keep looking for big boys shoes, find Tommy's basketball shoes with a pair of socks stuffed inside of them, socks look clean, SCORE! Finally find a pair of sandals for Gavin, they're the raccoon sandals (we left them outside one night and the raccoon chewed them up a little, still wearable, but full of little teeth marks) pack all the shoes, am thankful that Petey doesn't wear shoes yet, time to pack lunch, my least favorite part, pat myself on the back for being so smart the day before at the grocery store, Lunchables were on sale so I went wild, find the lunch bag, realize I never took the icepack out last night to refreeze, Oh well, find a frozen water bottle in the freezer, throw that in the lunch box as an icepack, pack three Lunchables, make three bags of grapes (one sliced for Finn), make three bags of cookies, eat three cookies, pack one frozen breakfast sandwich for Tommy, check the Poptarts, no cracks, (Gavin won't eat them if they are broken), pack them knowing they will be broken by the time he opens up the lunch bag, make a bag of Cherrios for Finn, pack them, decide the lunch is not nutritious enough and pull out the watermelon to slice it, remember I just bought a melon baller and want to try it out, find the melon baller still in the package, open it, don't waste time washing it, slice the watermelon in half, drip watermelon juice down the front of the dishwasher, crap, no time to clean it, we have to go, use the melon baller, comment that the balls of melon aren't as perfect as I imagined they would turn out, try a new melon baller technique, call Gavin over to show him, wait while he tries a few, note that his look better than mine, make three bags of melon for the boys, still not completely happy with the results, remind myself that this is not A Food Network Challenge, just lunch for the boys, decide I want some melon for lunch too, quickly make a container for myself, put the watermelon away, start analyzing how I pack fun junky food that they love out of guilt for making them go to daycare, I stop analyzing but am still not happy with the nutritional value of their lunch, I throw some carrot sticks (nothing fun about carrots) into three little bags and fill three little containers with Kraft ranch, I remember that Gavin swears he throws up if he eats Kraft ranch, find some ranch dip from Mcdonald's in the bottom of the frige, pack that for Gavin, the cat jumps up on the counter eats Gavin's rejected ranch dip, think to myself, strange that a cat would like ranch, realize he is out of cat food, lunch bag won't close now, too much stuff, find another lunch bag (I have lots of them as I often "Shop" in the school's lost and found), look but can't find another ice pack, sort lunch into two bags, "must be refrigerated" and "should be refrigerated", feel guilty about not refreezing the icepack from yesterday, make a mental note to find all the ice packs, I know we own lots of them, put the lunch bags into the backpack, praise myself for remembering to refreeze Petey's formula cooler bag last night, pull it out of the freezer, look in the frige for the container of formula, find four open containers, remember they expire in 48 hours, try to figure out how I to tell which ones have been in there over 48 hours, open them all up, smell them, they all smell the same, give up and throw them all out, feel guilty about throwing out formula, feel guilty not recycling the bottles, feel even more guilty that Petey is getting formula at daycare and not the frozen breast milk, think about packing the frozen bags of breast milk, try to picture Miss Tammie having to thaw out fourteen little bags of milk just to get him through the day, decide to grab a new bottle of formula, put it in the cooler bag and add it to the backpack, make a mental note to scold Scott for not labeling the formula containers, tell Gavin and Tommy to start getting dressed, I go get dressed, no socks, search the dryer, finally find a pair, find my shoes, missing one orthotic, put them on anyway, Baby Petey is crying, pick him up, trip over baby toys, get him undressed, get peed on, change my scrub top, missing the wipes, realize I already packed them, unpack the wipes, put new diaper and new outfit on Petey, put him in his car seat, adjust the straps (he did grow overnight), he smiles at me, I melt and decide to pull him back out just let him nurse for a minute, sit down to nurse him, hear Finn crying, Assure Petey he will get to nurse tonight, put him back in his car seat, he cries, go to kitchen to find a bottle, we only own one (that's another blog), can't find it, remember I never brought it out of the van last night, go into the master closet (yet another blog) to get Finn, pick him up and bring him out to the van to find Petey's bottle, Find the bottle under my seat with old formula in it, bring it in and wash it, quickly unpack the formula and fill the bottle, repack the formula, give Petey the bottle and try to soothe him, prop his bottle, feel guilty about that while I undress Finn and change him, skip the rash cream because it's already packed and the rash looks really good, dress Finn, find Finn's sippy cup, wash and fill Finn's it, give it to him, remind Gavin to get dressed and shut off the TV, answer several questions about the Loch Ness monster (must have been watching a show about it) notice Tommy is missing, find him under my bed with the packed lunch bag eating the cheese out of all of the Lunchables, decide that he's probably the culprit behind the dirty dishes under my bed, pull him out, pull out the opened Lunchables, tell him he will be eating all three Lunchables for dinner tonight, get three new Lunchables from the frige, repack the lunch bag, notice Gavin is getting dressed, shut the TV off myself, answer some Bigfoot questions, send Gavin out to the van, bring Petey out to the van, go back in to get the big backpack, my purse and the van keys, Finn escapes outside, put the backpack, purse and keys in the van, chase Finn through the wet grass, capture him and put him in his car seat, remind Gavin that he is to babysit while I grab the rest of the stuff, go back inside, slip on something (this is the closest I have been to doing the splits, ever) realize it's my missing orthotic, put it in my pocket, turn the thermostat up to eighty three (trying to save money) yell for Tommy, feed the cat, look for Tommy, find him changing clothes, he picks out a pair of too small pants and a long sleeve shirt, no underwear, I decide to let him wear it knowing he has his swim trunks as a back up outfit, shoo Tommy out to the van, shut off lights, realize I didn't brush my teeth, brush them, realize I didn't put on any makeup, throw on some mascara, shut off the bathroom light, grab my cell phone and run out the door, snag my pants on a bike in the garage, small rip, think about changing my pants, remember there are no clean ones to change into, decide no one will notice, get in the van, do roll call, missing Gavin, see him in the rear view mirror rollerblading in the road, yell for him to get in the van, he gets in the van skates still on, shut the garage door, Tommy's mad, he wants his skates, open the garage door, unbuckle my seat belt, get out and look for the skates, find two matching skates for Tommy and decide a good mom would make them wear helmets and pads, find the helmets, look at my cell phone and note the time, decide that scars build character so I skip the pads, open the back of the van, throw it all in and close it, get back in my seat, put my seat belt on and try roll call again, all accounted for, close the garage door and start backing out, my gas light goes on, I sigh, continue backing out and start trying to figure out how I am going to pick up diapers, get the boys to daycare without getting a speeding ticket (I sort of have a bad record), explain to my supervisor why I can't always get to work on time and why she needs to be flexible with me and also why I forgot my employee badge again.

Once I get all of this done, I can take a deep breath, put a smile on my face and walk into the ICU to start my 12 hour shift.


This is why I am so thankful that we are staying home today. On stay home days, we wake up late, stay in our pj's as long as we want. No packing and no planning, lots of cuddling and nursing and feeling like a good mom.

Think Before You Ask

Gavin, Tommy, Finn and Petey. Four children… better yet… four boys. We just brought our fourth child into the world a few weeks ago. I have finally been able to drag myself to the computer for the first time. In the ninth month of my pregnancy, I found it very irritating when people asked me obvious or stupid questions. I remember one woman in Target putting her hands on my belly, already pushing me over the edge, and then announcing to her family that this was the belly of a mother of twins. Not what you want to hear when you are only carrying one baby. I looked her straight in the eye and calmly said, “Actually it’s triplets.” During the same shopping trip I accidently went through the goth kid’s checkout lane. You know the one with the dyed black hair and the eyeliner. He announced after scanning the new receiving blankets, newborn diapers and nursing pads that he was psychic. He told me that he predicted that very soon I would give birth to a baby. Ya think? I acted offended and told him I wasn’t pregnant. I know this sounds extremely rude but something changes with your patience level when you reach the ninth month of pregnancy. I assured myself that this attitude would soon dissipate with the birth of my new precious bundle.
After the birth, things just seemed to get worse. Trying to manage four children in public is bad enough but can be made even worse when complete strangers have the nerve to ask incredibly personal questions. I have included a short list of my favorite questions and my even more favorite answers to these inappropriate queries.
First and foremost, yes they are all from the same father. I am shocked and appalled that people would even have the nerve to ask. Is this what our world is coming to, when it would be next to impossible to actually have four children by the same father? At least give me the benefit of the doubt. Assume that my husband is their father unless I tell you differently. Please. I sometimes offer the additional tidbit of information that they were all born in wedlock just to add to the shock value.
Do we want to try for a girl? Is this really the appropriate time to ask? Two weeks ago my world got flipped upside down or at least seriously tilted on its side when we brought Petey into our world. I had raising three boys down pat, and then voila, try four. I am pulling my hair out (actually it is starting to fall out on its own) just trying to get through the day and figure out how to bring four boys into Publix to get yet another gallon of milk. We really need to consider getting a cow, but that’s another column. And you want to know if I plan on trying for a girl. For the record, I am not sure, but once again I think this exact moment would be a poor time to give you an accurate answer to that question.
This question is similar to the previous one. Are we trying for a girl now? This one is even more obscene. After the trauma my body has suffered with the last pregnancy and most recently the birth, no we are not trying yet. I let these curious people know that I must actually go back for my six week appointment and get the ok from my doctor before we are allowed to start trying.
Here is my final and favorite question. What are you planning on doing for birth control? Unbelievably this question actually often comes from the general public. I always let these people know that we haven’t decided yet, but when we get ready to we will be holding a meeting and inviting all interested parties to attend to help us make that decision. Or better yet why don’t you come with me to my six week check up and we can both discuss my options with the doctor. Furthermore, maybe we don’t plan on doing anything for birth control.
I try to remain calm in all of the above situations and set a good example for my four little prodigies. If you have ever been guilty of one of the above offenses, the next time you see a brand new mom out in public with her brood please careful consider all questions you may have before asking. Is it possibly an incredibly personal question? Is it inappropriate in nature? Is it in regards to something she should be discussing within a doctor’s office? Remember there are trained professionals out there to handle all these sensitive topics and you are probably not the appropriate person to be asking. Even though you have many questions you are dying to ask, maybe a friendly wave or smile would be more appropriate that anything else.

Dinner for Two at an Empty Table for Six

It is almost bedtime for the boys and they had been in their bedroom most of the afternoon. When I went in to check on them I walked into their latest project. The Geotrax village. I am not sure why the bedding had to come off the mattresses or better yet why the mattresses had to come off the beds, but this is very typical behavior for them. With each stage of their lives come different kinds of messes. I recently wrote this poem taking a look at the kinds of messes and trouble these boys have gotten into over the years. It actually won a contest and was published.

As a mother of four incredible boys that grow up so quickly, I try to commit to memory snapshots of each juncture in our lives. I have always worked long-drawn-out weekends at the hospital leaving my poor husband home alone with the boys. Adventures, mishaps, blood loss and many other testosterone inspired activities have filled their weekends without me. I have many recollections of the past as well as visions of the upcoming when I imagine myself entering the front door late on Sunday nights to my unpredictable family.

Dinner for Two at an Empty Table for Six

I take a deep breath and open the door

The moving boxes are stacked from floor to ceiling grinning at me as a reminder of the toil that lies ahead. The house is silent. The only unpacked piece of furniture is the brand new dining room set. I smile as picture my ideal imaginary family gathered there. My vision includes a very well dressed young boy and a girl respectfully saying grace. They are holding polite dinner conversation while they pass the risotto. This will come soon enough I assure myself. But for now it’s just us and a candle lit dinner for two at an empty table for six.

I take a deep breath and open the door

I am handed a screeching, leaking, seriously livid little creature. I sink into the new rocking chair and convince him to nurse. I close my eyes and we rock. As soothing for him as it is for me. I have missed this little monster. I continue to rock him long after he and my husband have passed out from an exhausting weekend without me.

I take a deep breath and open the door

Greasy little hand prints cover the inlaid glass. I hear the familiar crunch of cheerios under my feet. It’s impossible to see the sippy cup until I kick it across the floor. Someone tugs on my pant leg. As I bend over to pick him up my water breaks, we turn around and head out the door back to the hospital to bring another little boy child into our lives.

I take a deep breath and open the door

I limbo under the still hanging Christmas lights over the threshold. I tread cautiously as I find myself entering a perfectly laid out matchbox city. I gracefully step over entire parking lots and city blocks as I maneuver my way through the busy metropolis. Soon I am on the city outskirts, leaping over the suburbs and entering the less inhabited countryside complete with farm equipment and animals. I start to lose my footing as I step directly on top of an airplane preparing for takeoff on the runway. With my next step I am lucky enough to find a clear stretch of floor. It’s an eight inch wide river that has saved me. Cursing under my breath I wander upstream past the occasional boat I am exhausted and looking to retreat in the living room when I realize that it has also been taken over by another development. The floor is barely visible through the maze of train tracks, depots and factories. As I stand in the river trying to figure out where to take my next step, I hear the engineer and the architect yelling from the bathroom. Mom, come see the Lego village we built in the bathtub.

I take a deep breath and open the door.

I start to karate kick my way through a four foot high pile of dirty laundry. Just when I have broken through to the other side I feel something cold and wet goosh up between my toes. Watch out mom, the cat threw up again. I promptly turn around and throw up onto Laundry Mountain. I am pregnant again and a little too queasy.

I take a deep breath and open the door

Super hero back packs with the contents spilling out are the obstacles of choice. The floor is covered with crumpled ripped homework that I will no doubt be ironing and taping tonight. After elegantly leaping over the disaster zone I feel a stab to my right heel. I examine the injury briefly then curse the Danish for ever inventing the Lego. In Dutch the word “Lego” must mean “to cause one great pain.” The pain quickly melts away as I am tackled by three wild beasts popping out from hiding. I try to act frightened and not laugh as they growl and snarl at me with their Koolaid mustaches. Their costume choices are very creative. One of them is wearing my leopard print lingerie. I am glad it is finally getting some use.

I take a deep breath and open the door

My only free hand sticks to the door handle. I instinctively pull my hand to my nose for further examination. It’s peanut butter. I reach for the sticky handle one more time and unlatch the door. I step into one of my least favorite activities to clean up. The dreaded camp out. The table and chairs have been adorned with every blanket, towel, sheet and rug in the house. There are four (yes, one more pregnancy and one more healthy boy have managed to sneak into our family) sleeping bags and four exhausted campers passed out under the table. As I look around I imagine that it must have been an eventful day. The real marshmallow roasting sticks and Hershey bars are out. A giant pool of wax with a tiny flickering flame spills out across much of the tabletop. I wonder where the camp director was while the campers roasted marshmallows over the vanilla scented candle. This disturbing thought quickly vanishes as I slide across the floor on an empty plastic wrapper. I guess they also found the graham crackers.

I take a deep breath and open the door

The aroma hits me like a bus, a prison bus to be exact. I consider turning around back outside. I decide to push forward and find the source of the rancid, only could come from a teenage boy, stench. As I enter the living room my radar goes off as I stare into a giant pile of sports gear. I guess it’s football season and I guess no one washed the equipment before putting it away last year. I also guess that this is my hint to please wash it. Hint taken. Three loads later it is washed, folded, and heavily Febreezed.

I take a deep breath and open the door

I cover my ears as I step inside. The smoke detector is ear piercing and almost as loud as the video game blaring from the surround sound. I enter the house unnoticed. Every piece of living room furniture including the area rug is draped with deaf teenage male zombies. Apparently we have become the new hangout house. I quickly find the source of the billowing smoke. It is an oven jam packed with five pizzas one of which is on fire. I am not sure which concerns me more, the fact that no one heard the smoke detector or that my monthly budget now contains a “frozen pizza” category.

I take a deep breath and open the door

All is quiet and the house is untouched, this is concerning. Although not as concerning as the note that lies on the kitchen table.
“Whatever the police say, it’s not true; don’t be mad, we’ll explain later.”

I take a deep breath and open the door.

As I set the mail down on the table another college acceptance letter spills out. I am thrilled but heartbroken. The last chick takes flight. Not to say he won’t return to the nest often with four weeks’ worth of dirty laundry, but gone none the less. One more empty bunk bed. I let a silent tear roll down my cheek as I smile.

I take a deep breath and open the door

Everything is in its place. I glance over at the flickering flame on the dining room table. I close my eyes and smile as I picture my perfect family. Four young men are laughing and kicking one another under the table as they stumble through grace. They are throwing the hot baked potatoes to each other across the table while they carry on a conversation about the latest NFL game. They will be back for the family get together. For now it’s just us and a candle lit dinner for two at an empty table for six.

And Remember, "Always Spay and Neuter Your Spouse"

Finding out I was pregnant with Petey (our fourth), was a shock to say the least. I was scared, overwhelmed but most of all, excited. While I was researching OB doctors, Scott was researching vasectomies. Maybe I am to much of a free spirit or too impulsive, but how could anyone know that they want to, for sure without a doubt, eliminate their chance of ever having a baby again. I know I should be counting my blessings that I have four wonderful healthy boys, but on the other hand, I am not 100% sure I NEVER want to have another child. I had to work pretty hard to talk him out of a vasectomy. I made sure I shared a few "vasectomy gone wrong" horror stories with him. Having a medical background, I was able to explain the procedure step by excruciating step with all the gory details included. What I didn't know, I made up. That shushed him for awhile. I told him this wasn't the right time to make such a permanent decision. It worked, until I delivered baby Petey and reality set in. Four children is really hard (this is a gross understatement). After I went back to work and left him home again, alone with the boys on the weekend, the vasectomy talk came up again. Even though I was no longer in the delirious state of pregnancy I still felt the same way. So we compromised. I would get the five year IUD. When I went to my consultation a few weeks ago my doctor sat me down and showed me all of my options. I really wasn't crazy about any of them. He recommended the Merena IUD. When I asked how effective it was, he explained that it was 99.99999999999% effective (or something like that). I must have shown disappointment. When he asked me why I looked so hesitant I realized something. I was hoping for some kind of very ineffective form of birth control so that Scott would be satisfied but we could accidentally get pregnant again. Crazy I know. After thinking about it for a few days I called back and made the appointment to get the Merena. It was definitely the responsible thing to do, but since when was "responsible" one of my qualities. It isn't and that's why I'm who I am and my family is who we are. I feel a little like the poster child for the "spay and neuter your pets" campaign. If you aren't responsible you could turn out like this crazy family! Today was the day. So, no more "unplanned" babies for five years. It wasn't as bad as I thought and I decided to allow myself this afternoon to sulk and feel bad about it and after that, I am going to find a positive side to focus on. Hopefully in five years I will be of sound mind and will feel like I have made the right decision. Deciding to have the IUD procedure was hard, but actually acknowledging the fact that I will not have anymore babies will be even harder. In the past, when one of the boys grew out of an outfit, it got carefully placed in a big gray Rubbermaid storage bin labeled with the size and placed in the garage waiting for the next boy to grow into them. I have a full wardrobe of little boy clothes from newborn all the way up to 5T. I already have a small pile of clothes that Petey has grown out of and now there is no need to save them for another baby boy. It will be very symbolic the first time I pack up his outgrown clothes get rid of them. As so many people have helped me out and given me clothes, I will do the same and hopefully find another family full of little boys to pass them onto. Well, time to end my pity party. The three big boys are marching through the living room, full of sand, on their way to the bathroom sink to wash their monster trucks. They woke up Petey and he is starting to cry. As I look over at him, I notice that is little yellow duck onesie is awfully tight, this is probably the last day he will ever wear that and the last time I will ever see that outfit on a little baby boy with chunky thighs and chipmunk cheeks. Oh yeah, the pity party ended, I forgot!

PJ Day

Some of my best days end just like this one has, sitting on a sofa full of little boys in my pajamas. Not because I just put my pajamas on, but because I never took them off this morning. My pajama shirt is on inside out and backwards (not sure how or when this happened). It's a v neck. You wouldn't think it would be comfortable, but it actually is. I am proudly displaying a silver plastic police badge on my collar. I have tried to remove it several times in the past few days only to have Tommy (the crazy four year old) chase me down and reapply it. He insists that I have to wear it because I have lots of money and I'm the boss. Maybe compared to him this is true, but not so in the real world. I also have some spots on my shirt. One of them is definitely baby spit up, but I am not too sure what the other is. I'm wearing one old blue flip flop. I had two of them earlier but Finn (the 1 1/2 year old) has been taking them off every time I sit down and now the right one is missing. I have one my most comfortable pink pj pants which in no way match the backwards black top. I purchased these when I was seven months pregnant with Gavin and not surprisingly they still fit. they are a little frayed and the drawstring is missing (who needs that anyway). As I remind my children often, "this is not a fashion show". My hair is up in a disheveled pony tail. The elastic band keeps falling out because it's about eight years old and my hair is thinning so much after the pregnancy. Makeup? Not today. I am lucky I even brushed my teeth. To an outsider like the traveling meat salesman that showed up today, I may appear to be an un kept, lazy, frumpy stay home mom. On a side note, what kind of a career is "traveling meat salesman"? I reminded him once again that we are vegetarian (we aren't) and he doesn't need to waste his time stopping by our place. Anyway, what they don't understand is that my to do list only has so many slots on it each day. So some days, if I want to fit everything in, and God forbid play with my children, I have to scrap some of the less important tasks such as showering and putting on clothes. We managed to keep the house in order today and have lots of fun. I got to read to Tommy (a luxury these days), practice rolling over with Petey (2 1/2 months), play a few games of Uno with Gavin (just turned 7) and throw balls with Finn. We rounded out the afternoon with a group nap. We like to pretend we are all puppies and sleep in a big pile. We had a very satisfying day to end the week. I am back to work at the hospital tomorrow. I like to know that I actually spent some quality time with the kids instead of just cleaning up after and disciplining them. It would be very easy to spend the whole day at home with the kids and never actually spend any quality time with them. I can get so caught up in the cleaning and cooking and planning. Knowing that we made some good memories this week will help me cope when I am away from the kids. It's hard not to feel like a bad mom spending every weekend at work and missing out on all the fun weekend things they do. I know that the important things this week were, dancing together in the living room and spraying each other with the hose, not being dressed to the nines every single day. I have little boys falling asleep all over me and it's so satisfying. It's almost time for bed and now I ponder, do I need to put on new pajamas now?

We just ordered new family stickers for the van. This may be the only time in my life where I can wear a bikini. I am taking full advantage. Scott ordered them and didn't order one for the cat (it would sit to the right side of Petey). I am probably over analyzing things when I decide that this must mean he subconsciously wants more children.

Adventures in Nursing

Baby Petey seems to have radar for two things. He can always sense when I sit down with a hot plate of food or when I open up the laptop. I have started and stopped this blog three times to nurse him. I guess this is my sign to write about nursing.
I have nursed all four of my boys and have fond and very funny memories of every one. Each time is different and each time is the same.
It starts off in the hospital with the always energetic and passionate lactation consultants. They are concerned with one thing and one thing only… breasts. You learn lots of new vocabulary like latch, let down and colostrum. You also learn an array of positions like the football and cradle hold. Lactation consultants are not shy and hopefully you aren’t either. If your modesty isn’t gone yet from the recent birth it will disappear in the coming months.
When you leave the hospital, you may as well leave topless because for the next few months you are going to be nothing more than a one woman dairy farm. If you must return to work you will soon be introduced to the breast pump. If you didn’t feel like part of a dairy farm before, I guarantee this will do the trick especially if you get the industrial strength double pump. It even comes with an adaptor for the cigarette lighter in the car. Although not recommended, I have been known to pump and drive. Imagine pulling up next to me at the stoplight. You quickly fill your freezer with tiny bags of milk. You learn to save even the smallest amounts. Your milk becomes a precious commodity. I can remember being furious with an airport once when they made me throw out a bottle of breast milk at a security check point. I decided to punish them by sitting just past the checkpoint and nursing my baby without the appropriate coverage. I think this probably went unnoticed by airport staff, but I felt better.
Speaking of appropriate coverage, with the birth of my third I purchased a great invention called the Hooter Hider. It’s really called this. It’s basically a blanket with a neck strap. This allows you to nurse the baby without having to hold your blanket in place. I no longer care about my own modesty but I do have a little sympathy for the general public and don’t enjoy embarrassing my own children when we are out. After the birth of baby Petey, on one of our first outings, my four year old Tommy begged me, “Mommy, please don’t get your breasts out at the YMCA.”
When you decide to nurse you open the door to lots and lots of advice. I tend to ignore most of this however, I do believe in the super healing powers of breast milk. None of my children were ever on antibiotics while nursing. My favorite piece of advice was when Finn, my number three child, was a newborn with a little eye infection. The doctor offered antibiotics but then ask if I was nursing. When I told him I was, he suggested I put a drop of breast milk in his eye every hour until the infection disappears. He told me milk was more powerful than any antibiotic. He was right. This leads up to my most recent and favorite nursing memory. Finn recently woke up with what looked like the dreaded pink eye. It was Memorial Day and I wasn’t getting him in to see the doctor any time soon. I quickly remembered the breast milk remedy and it just so happened that I seem to have an endless supply. Scott, my very cooperative husband, chased Finn down and pried his little eyelids open. It’s hard to produce milk on command, but the thought of dragging all four of the children to the doctor with weeping pink eyes gave me the inspiration. For the first few doses we tried to be discrete but for his third dose we happened to trap him in the living room. We proceeded as we had previously but his time we had an audience. Finn probably won’t remember this but his older brothers who were fascinated and full of giggles probably will. Gavin is six and will no doubt remember me doing this to his little brother. It was harmless now however it may come up later in therapy or a toast by the best man at Finn’s wedding.
Nursing my boys has been a great experience. I am not sure how much they will ever appreciate it but I am glad that it worked out for us. It gave me the chance to form inseparable bonds with each of them, kept them all healthy and created some very funny family memories for us. I would love to share some more nursing anecdotes but it has been fifteen minutes since Petey last ate so as you can imagine he is starving again and it’s time to nurse.

Who We Are

For those of you who are not familiar with my family yet allow me to introduce us. Sit back, prop your feet up and get to know us. We are the fun loving adventurous VanGrinsven family. My name is Erin. I met my husband Scott in ninth grade in a computer class. I thought he was an exchange student and he thought I was hot. We dated for five years and then during a Friday night fish fry he proposed. We married (we are sure people were taking bets on how long we'd last) and built a log cabin together in a small town in Northern Wisconsin. Scott and I worked for his dad in a Sears store that the family owned. I also had a small massage therapy business. After two years of marriage we had our first baby boy, Gavin. Another two years later we had our second boy, Tommy. Both boys were raised in the Sears store. We had their cribs set up in the lawn and garden department amongst the lawn tractors. After the birth of Tommy we decided we needed a change. We took out a US map, had a family meeting and decided south FL looked nice. Neither of us had ever been there but 3 months later houses and businesses were sold and we were driving to FL. It takes guts to pick up and move your family across country but it takes even more guts to stay there through the first year. Our first year was tough. We bought and sold two businesses. I decided my passion was nursing so started going to school and working at our local hospital. While going to school for nursing (my passion, remember?) I found my true passion in an English class, writing. Scott and I both understand that writing is not likely going to pay the bills, so I continue to go to school for nursing while writing on the side. Scott owns a successful Fed Ex route and loves it. After settling into our new house and getting into the school groove we found out I was pregnant again. Another boy. Finn was born in January of 2008. Don't ask me the day because I am still not too sure. This slowed down school but I persisted and completed the semester. When someone approached me about doing a surrogate pregnancy I felt compelled to jump right in and agreed to do it. We met and got to know the family and went to various appointments (doctors, psychiatrists, lawyers). Just before embryo transplant I had a sinking feeling that wouldn't go away. I took a pregnancy test to calm nerves. Yup, I was pregnant again. It was ours, not theirs. As history has a way of repeating itself the doctor confirmed it was another boy. Petey was born in April of 2009. So after ten years of marriage we have produced four incredible clever blond haired boys. Our life has become a wild, and I mean wild, adventure. Never ever a dull moment as these boys are a constant source of entertainment. I could laugh each day or cry, so I choose to laugh a lot. Taking care of this family is the most overwhelming challenge I have ever met in my life but I wouldn't want it any other way. Each day brings new adventures, stories and laughs.

Short Order Cook in The Front Seat

We recently took a very long road trip from Florida to Wisconsin and back. We normally fly, but with this year's budget (or lack there of) and my desire to "build family memories" we decided to drive. This is an annual trip we have taken back home since we moved to Florida five years ago. We budgeted $1,500 for the entire trip. After a van tune up costing $2,300 we were in the hole a week before we even left. I am a creative mom, however trying to go on a trip without any extra money is tough. Knowing how much it can cost to go out to eat, I vowed that we wouldn't go through one drive thru or order one happy meal. I knew we would get sick of eating sandwiches and traditional vacation cooler food, I got creative. I found a company called road Pro. road Pro manufactures small appliances for truck drivers. It was so hard to choose only one. I decided on the Road Pro Sandwich Maker. This is such a clever concept. It is a sandwich maker that plugs into the cigarette lighter. Now it was time to get creative with some good recipes. After doing lots of research I found some great recipes, some interesting websites, and laughed a lot. There is a whole web page for college students that gives you 500 recipes for dinner you can make in a coffee pot. Did you know you can make shrimp alfredo in a coffee pot? Ok, I am getting side tracked. So we were off. I had packed all my ingredients and recipe cards. We made a quick stop at a Pilot Travel Center to pick up our Road Pro Sandwich Maker. As I walked out of the Pilot I was so excited to get started. My family knows I am crazy but this probably moved me one knotch closer to insanity in their minds. As we started back on the road I carefully opened the box and read the instuctions. The "before first use" instructions were particularly entertaining. "After smoke and fumes subside, you are ready to cook." I pictured us cruising up I-75 with blue smoke billowing out our van windows, all of us choking and coughing. Luckily, no smoke and only minor fumes. One Clorox wipe down later, I was ready to take orders. We had to balance it on top of the portable fridge (got this at a rummage sale a few months prior) that sat on the floor between us. When we would take corners it would fall off and burn the lap it fell into. This was particularly entertaining when hot pancake batter scalded Scott's leg in Kentucky. On the menu I had Grilled Cheese, Hot Ham and Cheese, Pizza Pockets, Pancakes, Sausage, Sausage in Pancakes, and Taco Pockets. Everything was a success except the pancake syrup. Syrup in a vehicle never seems to work out. This item was omitted from the menu for the trip back. On the way back we used the sandwich maker to warm things up like mini corn dogs and chicken nuggets. These were very popular, a little too popular which lead to an over indulgent customer vomiting after his 11th mini corndog while driving through the Tennessee mountains. Since it would only make one small item at a time and it was a little slow, I was cooking and taking orders almost the entire way. All in all, I would say it was a great success. We didn't have to go out to eat at all. It was a great addition to our trip. The "Road Pro" as we called it saved us money, made us some good meals and provided us with lots of funny memories.

My First Blog

Welcome to my first blog. I am very excited to start on this new venture. My blog will provide an outlet for my writing, allow family and friends to keep up on our ever changing family life, and provide pure entertainment and laughs for anyone who has ever spent any time around young boys. I hope you enjoy. Here goes...